Hello again, my fearless readers. This week I would like to share with all three of you (and my mom) something that is truly near and dear to my heart, something that has had a profound impact on life in ways I cannot even begin to measure. Please forgive me if I begin to sound a bit emotional, but it is hard to restrain my feelings about this topic.
I want to talk to you, my trusted friends, about a little something called Amazon Prime, the most amazing thing since sliced bread. No wait, it’s better than that. It can’t even be compared to sliced bread (what a stupid metaphor anyway). Amazon Prime sits in the pantheon of human achievement, comparable to such inventions as the wheel, manned spaceflight and pants. It is the epitome of everything our species has ever worked for and has ever aspired to be. Amazon Prime is admissible proof of God.
However, as with any great and powerful being, there will be skeptics, as I sense some of you may be. This is acceptable and even understandable. I’m sure people were also doubters of shoes when they were invented too. But I am here, as a humble servant, to extinguish your disbelief, your fears and your reservations and bring you wholeheartedly to the altar of Amazon Prime.
It is the most incredible invention of our time, for one important reason: it enables me to buy anything, from anywhere and have it at my door in two days. Some people may call this “impulse buying” or “a problem,” whereas I call it magic, as that is the only word that can explain its existence. Impulse buying, as it is sometimes called, is actually one of my favorite past times, and I refuse to believe it is a bad thing.
The joy received from seeing something you want (just something small of course, we aren’t talking houses or cars here) and making it yours is a great thing. It’s a gift to yourself because you know what you want more than anyone else, and you deserve it, dammit! This isn’t just something I’m making up either (although I do that a lot)- retail therapy is an actual thing that exists. The thing that is sometimes referred to as science has proven that small, spontaneous purchases release dopamine in some people. And in case you don’t comprehend the science words, dopamine is a chemical released in the brain to control the pleasure and reward centers. In other words, impulse buying can make you happy. Science says so!
The power to buy anything we could need on a whim from our couch is an amazing thing, and it’s good for your soul! How can something that makes people happy be a bad thing?
All hail the impulse buy.
