Hello, friends. As you may be aware, April Fool’s Day is upon us! Some of you might be readying yourself for spectacular pranks, others might be preparing to be the butts of said pranks, and others still might just not give a shit. But for those who are indeed givers of the shits, this is the column for you.
I have searched the Internet long and hard, read list after list, done furious research, and explored more than Dora ever has. So, here, I present to you, my dear readers, the best of the best and crème de la crème of my oh-so-expansive efforts that totally were not just a quick google search.
Let’s start with some classic ways to play some pranks on your friends. You have probably heard these before, but they are worth a second look, especially as the first approaches.
To start with, there is the classic Oreo prank, where you replace the cream inside Oreos with toothpaste and offer them to your victims… err friends. Then, we have the time tested gag of changing the names in their cell phone, or swapping the language in their computer, or even worse still, making their default search engine Bing. You could also set some random alarms and calendar events on their phone at odd times of the day, put a sticky note over the sensor on their mouse so it won’t work, or turn everything in their car (volume, heat, wipers, etc) up to 11.
But surely, we can do better than that. If you really want to make April Fool’s Day memorable, you need to think outside of the box.
One of my personal favorites works especially well if your friend has a water-bottle, mug or something-of-the-like that they use everyday. Simply coat the rim (where their lips touch) with a little bit of Orajel and watch as their lips go numb. You could also further mess with their morning routine by slipping a cube of Chicken Bullion flavoring into their showerhead, or taking the deodorant out of their deodorant stick and replacing it with butter. While you’re at it, go ahead and fill their hair dryer (if they have one) with flour and cover their soap with a layer of clear nail polish so it won’t get sudsy.
After all of this, your friend or roommate is bound to hate you, so you might want to do them a favor to make up for all the abuse. Perhaps hang up all their clothes for them, and by hang, of I of course mean tape them all to the ceiling. Or maybe it’s just best to switch your focus from a single individual to everyone around you. Why not cause a bit of general mayhem by switching push and pull signs on doors, or securely attach a cup to the roof of your car and drive around and enjoy the confused and worried faces of other drivers?
However, perhaps the best prank is no prank at all. Leave notes and weird cryptic messages all around to make your victim think that there will be a massive antic, but then do nothing all day. Then just sit back and watch them worry.
Good Luck!
