With February drawing to a close, and Valentine's Day having just recently passed, (thank God) I’m sure many people still have romance on the mind and now is as good a time as any to remind you that relationships take work, people. Welcome to yet another weekly Rotunda Row, where I, your friendly neighborhood columnist, give you advice that I am totally unqualified to give! Let’s get started, shall we?
Now, there are many issues that can sour a perfectly good relationship: communication, trust, space and so on. However, today I am not going to focus on these trivial squabbles, but instead on the real hard hitting and important issues that face romantically attached people.
First, what happens if your pookie doesn’t appreciate your sense of humor? You might think your cheesy puns are hilarious, but she thinks they could be cheddar (HAHA.) What are you to do? Well, you have two choices: either adapt your jokes, or (and this is my personal favorite) keep telling your bad jokes all day, until she either starts laughing at them out of pure insanity or leaves you for someone who physically can’t talk. Your choice.
However, maybe your little love muffin thinks you are funnier than any stand up comedian ever, but thinks you dress like a blind 7-year-old, and this causes problems between the two of you. To this, I again give you two options. You either wear a tux, everywhere, everyday. Sleep in it, bathe in it, exercise in it, etc. No one will ever be able to tell you that you aren’t well dressed. Or, you can just say, "screw it," and wear those mismatched socks and dirty winkled polo, if you want. It’s your life, man.
Now you might be asking, what If I am the one who has a problem with my significant other, then what? Maybe they snore when they sleep, or are one of those people who can’t spell out the words “you” and “are.” Whatever the issues, it’s important that you mimic it perfectly so that they can see how utterly ridiculous they are and how you are the best at everything. How dare they do something different than you.
As usual, I’m using these completely logical and not at all ridiculous examples to make a point, so just bear with me. Relationships aren’t easy, and no one is perfect. It’s easy to get caught up in little trivial things that go wrong, and those little issues can snowball to disastrous effect. So it’s important to work through these little problems, and communicate honestly and all that Dr. Phil stuff. I feel like this goes without saying, but all of the petty revenge stuff usually isn’t a good idea.
