When the phrase, “What does it mean to be masculine” is typed into Google the first listing is a definition which reads, “having qualities or appearance traditionally associated with men, especially strength and aggressiveness.” This interesting definition highlights some major issues that come with masculine gender role socialization. Masculine gender role socialization refers to the way in which society teaches those who want to be “masculine” how to act. It suggests that in order to be considered masculine, a person must be strong and aggressive. One of the unfortunate aspects of this socialization is that there is a fine line between being strong, assertive and independent versus being aggressive and dominate. Ultimately, the more we encourage our men to fit this socialized mold we may also inadvertently be encouraging acts of domestic and sexual violence.
Seriously, how can we (as women, sisters, family members and friends) expect our men to be physically, mentally and professionally the strongest, without experiencing any competition from anyone else? These expectations/socializations can result in an extreme determination to get what one wants no matter what anyone else says. Instead of having all of these expectations for how men should act, why can’t we just accept everyone for who they truly are?
Take a second to reflect on how you expect the men in your life to act. Do you expect him to be your protector? Is he supposed to be tough and dominate? If so, maybe you should begin to rethink how you perceive men. Yes, it may be hard to change how our society perceives men, and no this change will not happen over night. However, if you begin to change how you socialize men then maybe someone else will follow suit.
Understanding this, as students on a university campus we have an overwhelming opportunity and ability to make a statement. If all the students and organizations on campus came together and created a campaign that encouraged men to be their true selves instead of encouraging them to meet societal expectations we could have a significant impact on our society. Therefore, as stated above, this change really can start with us. To initiate change we must first change our own expectations of how men “should” act, then we can encourage our friends, roommates, sisters, brothers, classmates, teammates and anyone else we interact with to have an open mind as well. Please, take advantage of this amazing opportunity and use it to initiate change, because if you don’t who will?
