There are only three things that can be taken away from the movie “The Family,” which premiered in theatres Friday, Sept. 13. One: Dianna Agron (“Glee,” “I am Number Four”), who portrays daughter Belle in the film, cannot run at all, whether it is in tennis shoes or heels. Two: Robert De Niro (“Meet the Parents,” “Goodfellas”), as the father and former mobster Giovanni, should never become a writer or an author of any kind. Then finally, three: the film successfully made a full circle, ending the movie in the exact same way it began.
Along those lines, “The Family” begins with the clan driving from the French Riviera to a small town in Normandy under the witness protection program. The group arrives in full, Giovanni, Maggie (Michelle Pfeiffer: “Scarface,” “Dark Shadows”), Belle and Warren (John D’Leo: “Brooklyn’s Finest”), the son. As the next day begins, each character is exposed in their own way to the new life with an assumed new last name, Blake. The kids make their way through the school, identifying allies and enemies by the time they get to lunch. It becomes immediately clear that, while
Warren is the brains, Belle is nothing of a damsel in distress, beating up any guy or girl who treats or tricks her badly.
Maggie, on the other hand, has her own way of dealing with townsfolk she doesn’t like. After overhearing a store owner and workers mocking her for being an ugly American, she sets fire to the stock room and ultimately causes half of the building to explode.
Over the next few days, Giovanni, who is supposed to be living under the alias Fred, spends his time writing his memoirs about being in the mob. Against the advice of his handler, Robert Stansfield (Tommy Lee Jones: “Men in Black,” “No Country for Old Men”), he tells the neighbors he is a writer. The only character Giovanni seems to maintain as a friend throughout the entire film is the family dog – who inadvertently witnesses several murders and crimes made by “Fred.”
It is to be assumed that the family spends several weeks at the home, but over the course of that time, word manages to travel from Europe back to a prison in the States that they are hiding out in Normandy. Apparently Giovanni went to the police years ago and turned his family in for being in the mob and now plenty of people are trying to kill him. By sheer dumb luck, the right – or wrong – people are told his family’s whereabouts and they are immediately hunted.
Warren has somehow gotten himself into so much trouble at school that he feels he needs to leave his family, while Belle decides she no longer wants to live because the man she loves does not love her back. Yes, somehow it is these two who first discover the mob is in Normandy to kill the family.
The last few scenes seem rushed, thrown together in a mash up of guns and curse words all in about 15 minutes. At no point in time was it made clear as to why Giovanni ratted out his family or how long they have really been under witness protection. The cursing throughout the movie seemed unnecessary and unnatural for anyone but De Niro.
There were so many more ways the movie could have been improved, but it was not. With such high list actors, much more was expected with little outcome. The only character I felt passionate about was the dog. If he had died, I would have walked out of the theatre.
Giving the movie two and a half stars would be generous, so it gets two.
