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Sex in the 'Ville

Can Men and Women Really just be friends or does the Sex part always get in the way?

Published: Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Updated: Tuesday, May 31, 2011 17:05

By Tara Carr and Nicole Haskins
Rotunda ReportersWhen it comes to friendships between men and women there's always the question of where things could go.

Even though most male-female relationships stay platonic, at some point someone could develop feelings. There's always some level of sexual tension inherently between the two genders. It's only human nature for us to think about whether or not we could see ourselves with that person romantically. After all, most good, solid relationships are based on friendship. The problem comes in when our friendship with that person threatens a relationship with your significant other. It's okay to test the waters if you are single, but if you're in a monogamous relationship, then you should probably think about the impact this friendship could have on your relationship.

As a college student, it's necessary to have your own set of friends in order to discover your true self and form a sense of independence. Every relationship needs a balance of inclusion and separation. It is important for you to feel confident in your own identity with or without your partner. You can contribute more to the relationship if you are happy within yourself, and having friends outside of the relationship can add to that.

Still there must be a level of trust in order for the two of you to have a happy relationship. A lot of people say, "I trust my partner, but I don't trust their friend". You never know what their intentions are for being in the friendship in the first place. It could especially become a problem if it's not a mutual friend between the two of you. If it's someone outside of your circle of friends, you have to understand that your boyfriend or girlfriend may not have the same level of trust as you do for that person. After all, how do you really know what's going on in their mind?

You have to really ask yourself if having that friend is worth jeopardizing your relationship. How is that special friend really benefiting you? Is having that friend of the opposite sex worth losing the one you love? If the answer to this question is no, then you might have to let your friend go or at least begin to distance yourself from the friendship.

You should also consider if you were attracted to that person before you got in a relationship. Maintaining this friendship with the person you once had feelings for will only add unnecessary stress to yourself. After all, you can't just get rid of those feelings. Your feelings don't end when you get a promise ring, an engagement ring, or any other kind of ring! It's best to just not put yourself in that situation.
If you feel like you and your boo can handle having a friendship outside of the relationship then go for it! But just think about it - should you really be cuddling, holding hands, or saying I love you with that "friend"?


Top 10 Couples That Started Off as Friends
1. Chandler and Monica
2. Samantha Jones and.everyone!
3. Ross and Rachel
4. Belle (Beauty) and the Beast
5. Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake
6. Rihanna and Chris Brown
7. Romeo and Juliet
8. Mulan and Captain Li Shang
9. Super Man and Louis Lane
10. Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston

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